


Can't fight this feeling

by OrChan12



Series: Tsukiyama week 2019 [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Fluff, M/M, Music, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-07-29 12:16:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20082061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OrChan12/pseuds/OrChan12
Summary: Since the moment they are little kids and until they get older, music was always there. Here are some moments in their lives and the songs that were with them at these moments





	Can't fight this feeling

**Author's Note:**

> AU there the boys got my taste in music!
> 
> Sorry for spelling/grammar mistakes.

Music is a form of art that has the power to express human emotions- love, betrayal, heart-break or anger. It doesn't need lyrics to provoke our thoughts. Our lives are filled with sounds some we can relate to, feel a sense of nostalgia or simply enjoy it for fun.

The first thing Yamaguchi Tadashi learned about his friend, Tsukishima Kei, was that he loved music. When asking his friend about his favorite, Kei replied his favorite artists were the same as his older brother's. Akiteru listened to 70's-80's rock music such as AC/DC, Pink Floyd or Led Zeppelin. Tadashi didn't understand the lyrics, but he enjoyed the loud music. Kei was smart and he explained the meaning for some of the songs. He never would have guessed that a song called "stairway to heaven" was about a greedy woman who thought she could buy everything with money.

After Kei found out he had been lied to by his brother, he shut himself for a while. He refused to listen to music. Tadashi took it upon himself to make a new playlist for Kei- one that included different type of songs. He put other old rock bands, such as Iron Maiden and Black Sabbath. He himself liked modern music and he put a little mix of artists like Ed Sheeran and Sia. He added old school Japanese artist such as Matsubara Miki and Yamashita Tatsuro. He didn't skip Remioromen, One Ok Rock or Kenshi Yonezu. It was a mix of everything.

On Kei's birthday he shared the playlist with him. "I don't want it," Kei refused to listen.

"Those songs are different! I know how much you like music. There are so many bands out there," Tadashi tried hard but no avail. Kei refused to listen to anything.

Tadashi gave up and went home. The next morning, he met Kei in front of the school. It was the first time after a long time he saw Kei wearing headphones. "I really like some of the songs," Kei said while blushing.

Kei and Tadashi shared the same taste in music. After a while Kei listened to Akiteru's playlist again. It made him feel a sense of nostalgia. Tadashi might have picked different bands, but overall the songs were the same. Kei listened to music constantly, even when doing homework. The only times he wasn't wearing his headphones was when eating with his family or when spending time with Tadashi.

_"Starlight raining over me. Like drifting through a memory. Wake up in your crystal sky. We're floating till we fly"_. Kei always thought of Tadashi like starlight. It wasn't the freckles that covered his skin, but he gave a special light to Kei's life. When one looks into the stars, they feel they are watching the most amazing beautiful thing. That was how he felt towards his best friend.

In their high school years, the two boys were more aware of each other and what they felt. Tadashi was the first to confess. Of course he did. He was braver than anyone gave him credit for. Only he didn't have the courage to give a proper answer. What was Kei afraid of? He knew he loved him, so why he lied about not being sure? As awkward as it was, they decided to act neutral, but their teammates noticed the strained relationship, even idiots like Hinata or Kageyama.

"Is everything okay between you two?" he heard Hinata asking Tadashi.

"Of course, it is."

"Did you two had a fight?"

"It was nothing like that."

Not satisfied with the answers he got, Hinata took Tadashi somewhere else, away from Kei. He might have been a moron, but he did understand people. Tadashi would probably open to him too as the two became close friends. 

During a break the two managers announced they should hang out together outside the court, so they planned a fun evening at a karaoke. Kei groaned but he went along anyway.

The evening went exactly how he expected. Tanaka and Noya made his ears bleed with their bad rapping. The third years were okay. Yachi was nervous the entire time and Kageyama and Hinata sang with her most of the times. Tadashi sang too and everyone were surprised by his hidden singing talent, except for Kei who already knew that.

His upperclassman, Suga gave him the microphone. Everyone stared at him, waiting for him to pick a song. "I don't want to." He wasn't a terrible singer. He wasn't in the mood.

"You have something you want to say, don't you?" Suga suggested. Then he whispered so no one else could hear. "Hinata came to me for an advice. He didn't tell me any names, but it was obvious. You need to give a proper answer."

Kei knew he was right. He took the microphone. He felt singing wasn't enough. "Yamaguchi, I know I didn't give you a proper answer, so I'm about to give one now." And so he started singing.

_"Oh, I can't fight this feeling any longer and yet I'm still afraid to let it flow. What started out this friendship has grown stronger I only wish I had the strength to let it show."_

English wasn't Tadashi's strongest subject, but he knew enough to understand the lyrics. The third and some of the second years were a little bit surprised but let the show go on. Yachi and Shimizu looked like they were moved. Hinata, Kageyama, Noya and Tanaka struggled with the lyrics and understanding the people around them. Tadashi listened to the song and a tear ran down his face. Kei didn't finish the song.

Tadashi stood up. Someone stopped the music. "It's not like you to confess through a song."

"That was a confession!?" He heard Tanaka and Noya yelling. Suga shut them up.

Kei ignored them. "I don't why I got cold feet. I liked you for a long time. This was a way for me to apologize for treating you like that. I was afraid, but I'm not any more, and I'm ready to let everyone know that."

"I was afraid you would turn me down." Tadashi was always open about his feeling while Kei was acting cold. There were tears running down his freckled cheeks.

"Don't be stupid. We are a team after all, you and I."

"I like you."

Kei wiped Tadashi's tears with his fingers. "I like you too."

Everyone in the room cheered, making the new couple blush. They forgot they weren't alone for a moment.

"Wait, are we supposed to cheer for two men becoming a couple?" Tanaka questioned. 

"You're right, that it is weird," said Noya. "But they are our friends. And they are happy together."

"We need to support our friends. Besides, that means more girls for us."

"You're smart Ryu! We shouldn't care about things that don't matter like the fact they are both men. We need to care about more potential girlfriends for us!"

Thus, Tanaka and Noya gave their approve. 

Suga looked exhausted. "What are we going to do about you two?"

Through collage years they made a romantic playlist. It was Tadashi's idea as he was the one who cared about that stuff, but Kei put songs from time to time, songs that made him think of his boyfriend. It was a playlist they listened to sometimes on their trips or when they were away from each other for a long time.

It turned out useful. The day it was announced gay marriage were legal in Japan, Kei bought a ring with the help of his brother. The two families were excited about the news- they were all supportive of the relationship. Planning a wedding was harder than the couple expected to the point they regretted choosing a ceremony over a simple registration.

"At this point I'm not sure this wedding is for us," sighed Tadashi. It didn't feel like they were planning one of the most important days in their lives. It was more of planning a party for the guests.

Kei took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "Tell me about it. Only thinking about the guest-list gives me a headache. My mom is bugging me to get contact lenses."

"Why? You look so cool with glasses!"

"Go figure," Kei said.

"At least your mother isn't a wedding planner. She doesn’t give me a break." He starched his back when he was reminded another chore his mother gave him. "Oh, we also need to pick up a song for our dance."

"We have a dance?" They both agreed they didn't want the attention, so it was no wonder Kei complained.

"She insists." Tadashi stood tall with a proud look on his face. "But I negotiated, and we have to tolerate this for only a minute!"

"So, we still need to get through the trouble of picking a song?"

"Don't worry about it, Kei. We already have our playlist, remember?"

"Tadashi, we are finishing our degrees and become adults. It's weird to have a playlist filled with love songs."

Tadashi didn't listen to his boyfriend's complaining. Instead, he searched for a song that would fit the mood.

"_I’d love to keep smiling in front of you. Wanting to see you smile, gives me the strength to live on."_

He offered his hands to the blond exhausted guy in front of him. "Let's take a break."

"It's not a break if we do this because we have to."

Tadashi pouted but he didn't give up. Kei was couldn't handle his boyfriend looking at him like that and played along."

Being two working adults and parents didn't give them much time for themselves. Who knew raising one kid meant so much work? They loved their daughter, but they needed time on their own.

Kei tucked little Aya to bed. He waited for her to fall asleep before he went to the living room and sat down on the couch. It was Tadashi's turn to do the dishes. Even at the age of thirty-four he realized he still couldn't get enough of his partner.

"Did you read her a story?" Tadashi asked.

"Yes, she wanted me to read her 'Cinderella'. Again." Only Tadashi would be able to know he wasn't complaining. It was cute that his little girl had a favorite tale.

He could see Tadashi smiled at the statement. He finished cleaning and joined his husband. "Do you think she remembers it was the first fairy tale we read her?"

Kei wrapped his arms around Tadashi. "She was only a baby. No one remembers anything from that age."

They sat down for few more hours before going to bed. These days they didn't have the energy to stay up late. The nights they spent only the two of them became rare, every night-out they made it count. Their parents weren't always around, and it was hard to find a good babysitter.

They were ready to go to sleep when they heard a knock on the door. The two looked at each other puzzled. "Come in, Aya," Tadashi called her.

The little girl slowly opened the door and picked inside. She hesitantly walked inside, holding the teddy-bear she got for her birthday. There were tears streaming down her face. "I had a nightmare-" she said quietly, afraid her parents get angry with her.

She didn't need to say anything more. Tadashi got up and went to comfort her. "It's okay. You can stay with us if you want."

The little girl nodded and got up, making herself comfortable. Being around her parents made her feel safer. She stopped crying immediately. "Do you want me to read you another bed-time story?" Kei suggested. The girl nodded a 'no' with her head.

"Do you want me to sing you a lullaby?"

This time the girl agreed. "Can you sing me the song we heard the other day?"

When they went shopping all of them together, one of the stores played a foreign song Tadashi recognized as the song that was played on their first date after the karaoke. Kei never told Tadashi that the lyrics always made him think of their relationship, how he would be lost without his love.

"_You're the first face that I see, and the last thing I think about. You're the reason that I'm alive, you're what I can't live without_."

Aya was sound asleep. Both her parents looked at one another, admiring the adorable sight in front of them.

"Don't you think she will make a great big sister?" asked Tadashi.

"I think you might be right."

Being a parent was hard, but it was worth it, especially when you chose the right person for that mission.

"Why do they insist on eating outside?" grumbled Kei. "We could have something nice here."

Tadashi fixed his tie. "The kids wanted to do something nice for us. Don't act like a grumpy old man."

"I'm a grumpy old man."

Tadashi smiled. Some things never change, even you're at your seventies. "You know what I mean."

They finished getting ready. They left early, which didn't matter when they were old and slow. They were healthy for their age, but time has its way to affect people. The couple made a small talk on their way. They weren't lovey-dovey much in their older days, but they had their way of still show love.

They reached to the place of the event. Inside there was a big banner that said, "happy 50th anniversary!" All their relatives gathered around to congratulate them. Aya came with her four children. Himari, their younger daughter, cradled her son in her arms while greeting them.

Akiteru came by himself. "I can't believe you've made this far, my baby brother."

"Onii-san, please, I'm seventy-two."

The evening went great, they were surrounded by family members they loved. It was a hard work, but Tadashi was proud at the family he built with Kei. It gave him a lot of pride. As the evening went on, someone put the song they ended up choosing for their wedding.

"_And we have gone through good and bad times, but your unconditional love was always on my mind. You've been there from the start for me, and your love's always been true as can be_."

Tadashi thought Kei would refuse, as he knew his partner after more than fifty years of spending time him. He found it a pleasant surprise when he was offered to dance.

"At least it's a smaller audience."

Kei felt pain in his entire body. He was afraid of going to sleep because he knew he would never wake up. He lived his life to the fullest- he had a job he liked, married the love of his life and built a family of his own. He may hadn't reached the age of one hundred, but he was ready to go.

Tadashi was with him by his side. He was almost blind by this point, but he knew who was holding his hand the entire time.

"Does it hurt again?" asked Tadashi worriedly.

"Yes," he mumbled back.

"Is there anything I can do?"

There was one thing that could calm him down at times like this. "Talk. Or sing. I don't care as long as I hear your voice."

Tadashi obliged. _"Oh, I can't fight this feeling any longer and yet I'm still afraid to let it flow. What started out this friendship has grown stronger I only wish I had the strength to let it show."_

Kei spent his last few moments listening to his lover's soothing voice.

**Author's Note:**

> Songs that were used for the fic (I do NOT own any of these):  
\- Starlight by Jai Wolf https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9VoDwy-3Lc  
\- Can't fight this feeling by REO Speedwagon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmo36gnUCWE  
\- Egg by Kaela Kimura https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0JzNG3pTh4Y (Couldn't fine the long version)  
\- Don't deserve you by Plumb https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmyXjizpodo  
\- Warmness on the soul Avenged sevenfold https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBaF0Fs72aI
> 
> This are song that I think fit the ship.


End file.
